Ready for satuday

So I'm just flat out ready for it to be Saturday. Ready for a day off to do nothing. Just seems like this week has just not gone well. Starting with the Ex. Now I know I shouldn't let what an ex get to me, but it does. It's kinda part of the depression. Hanging onto the negative more then the positive. Like for instance a lot of people have said they miss seeing me all week, but the one thing that sticks in my mind is my Ex being an ass. I was closing up last night and I just kept thinking about it. I also just kept feeling like I was a fat ass. Someone mentioned that I had strong legs, but I said no they are just fat. I just kept insisting that I had fat legs. That there wasn't any muscle on them keeping in mind I only have about 7 something lbs of fat on my entire body. Yeah I think I'm kinda going back to a depressed state, because it's been winter for so long. I think once I see some spring sun and no more snow I'll be in a better mood. It's why I hate taking off a day from working out. Makes me feel like I'm just sitting there doing nothing getting fatter. I think I'm always going to suffer from a poor body image. There was this guy that came in and I mean the guy has a six pack. He gained weight while losing body fat. The guy was still not satisfied. I think I suffer from what he suffers from. He was so worried that one of his muscles on one side looked more worked out then the other. You had to be right up there squinting to notice a difference. I mean I would kill for the stomach he has. Probably keep all my other proportions though. I do weight more then him both muscle and total weight wise. I guess it's a combination of society's fault and mine for my poor self image. In a world where they constantly show perfection it's hard to not set your standards to that. Like I said several times whenever you pick up a fitness magazine the models do not look like that 24/7. Bodybuilders don't look like they do at shows 24/7. Yet that's what we get shown. We see the air brushed, photo shop, perfect version. Then when we see them in real life we cut them down for getting so "fat" and "out of shape". I guess I've been in my head too much. Yeah I do need a day off to think of nothing. Those usually keep me from killing people or getting to depressed. So squiby has been down....a lot lately. It's why I haven't posted any of them in forever. I swear the site goes down more often then Paris Hilton. Yeah that was a zing. Yeah I can't stand her. Anyway today's video is one that was playing when I was working out the other day. It's called Upside Down by the A*Teens. I really loved that group growing up. Just thought they had some good songs. Then I learned that like 85% of there stuff is just remakes of other songs. Like ABBA's stuff and a song by Elvis. Or Under the Sea from the Little Mermaid. Anyway this song (as far as I know) is an original. It got stuck in my head a lot once I heard it. Hope you all enjoy it. Today's tip is you can't move forward if your always looking back, but you have to look back to learn from the past, so just move sideways.